My journey of Faith has not be that of a perfect transformation. But it a slow (very slooowww perhaps) as well as full of the ups and downs of my oh-so-colorful life.
But what struck me were the questions of: humility, forgiveness and obedience.
HUMILITY to accept ones mistakes, shortcomings. When to be humble and all. What will force you to be in this state amidst the power and possessions that one might have.
FORGIVENESS to oneself foremost, then to family and to our persecutors. Is there a quota or should we say a limit as to when we forgive? Can we just not to forget the wrong that have done to us?
OBEDIENCE on who to follow? When to follow and maybe we tend to question as well do we really need to OBEY?
I began to reflect on these three virtues and lemme say this-- truly a mind boggling reflection I did!
HUMILITY should be at all times present and forever be made in order for us to be warriors of Christ. There are times, when we feel that we are powerful because of, say a position we hold in our family, school or community, we tend to lose grip of this and try to justify our self righteous actions as serving our God. Humility is not being the last being timid but stepping down on the pedestal and connect, relate and serve the least of our brethren. Humility is not sitting in the corner, sulking and trying to act like you are humble enough to be a wallflower. It is making yourself a Servant for the least of our brothers and sisters. Not a Master or Royalty. It is seeking out and being grounded and seeking the Glory of our God. I ask The Blessed Trinity Father, Son and Holy Spirit to guide me on this road to be a Humble Servant of our Father.
FORGIVENESS is a very strong word. We tend to be mathematical wizards on forgiveness. Counting all the right and wrong a person has made. Making a tab every time a person fails to meet our expectations because of (let's face it!) weaknesses and fears. Yes, these two are the factors why a person commits mistakes. But are we to judge that? When we commit mistakes, does our Father tell us "Hey you! You've done your 4,161,996 mistake! Am counting! Just so you know" phrase... Hah! We are people not divine as always been said by us. We can forgive but will never forget... Our God is not such! He willingly gave his LIFE in our for us to be forgiven of our sins. Right up to his last breath, He uttered such beautiful words
“Father, forgive them for they know not what they do...”(Luke 23:34)
As beautiful as these words, we Men are still not contented. We still have to ask " How often shall we forgive? As many as seven times?" and our Father had answered "I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven” (Matthew 18:22). That says it all, there is NO QUOTA ON FORGIVING... Whew! Truly a strong word that is!
I read a theory of Fr. J and I quote "The only way for us to even begin to forgive is to remain connected to the person who has hurt us or gone astray." Uhhh! So the question lies To Forgive and Forget or to Forgive and NOT Forget? Many among us will truly place our mind and heart on the first, but what is divine is the second. We shall truly be elated if we hear our "I forgive you and forget everything you've done wrongly".
May I use this message to end the virtue of FORGIVENESS... It’s similar to what the poet Rilke wrote in his Letters to A Young Poet: “Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love.” Change the word “frightens” to “hurts,” and hopefully you get the picture.
LAST is OBEDIENCE. As what I said to my class, there are only two things in life "black and white" not gray (nor red). Either you do good or evil. Whom do you obey? These very words frightens me so much that even I tremble on the very thought. Our GOD is a merciful, loving Father. We obey him and we get life eternal.
In all humility, I truly can say that I am a repentant sinner and will always work my way up to be the transformed daughter of the God of goodness. I am learning the hard way but I count them as blessings and graces that my Father God wants me to learn for me to be stronger day by day.
Full of trust and love, I can now say, peace be with my God and will LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL MY HEART, AND WITH ALL MY SOUL, AND WITH ALL MY MIND, AND WITH ALL MY STRENGTH.'